Thursday, August 24, 2006

Groove B. Chill - "Hip Hop Music"

This was a fun little ditty from the short-lived Groove B. Chill. It's a pretty catchy song with a well-known beat. The cutesy video was clearly made for white people, with its pan-ethnic cast, little kids trying to dance with an old lady, and the fact that they got their hip hop essence out of a Cross Colours catalog.

The song, and group for that matter, are notable for featuring character actor Daryl "Chill" Mitchell, who you may remember as wheelchair-bound Eli on the TV show "Ed," or the black guy in "Galaxy Quest," or the newbie in "Sgt. Bilko." (Trivia: he played a character named Chill both on "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" and in the first two House Party movies.)

This also points to the very likely fact that the other two members of the group are named "Groove" and "B".

Hip Hop Music - Groove B. Chill


Who said rap ain't music? Please tell me how
Elvis Presley ain't do nothin' that we ain't doin' now
Sellin' records by the millions, girls gettin' laid
We must be doin' somethin' brother, because bills gettin paid
(You mean rap is sellin'?) Nah rap done sold
We been overcame but you just wasn't... told.

Chi Ali - "Age Ain't Nothin But a #"

This one's for you Toddy.

First of all, who the f**k does Chi Ali think he is making all sorts of demands on women, saying they have to be older and more mature. Chi Ali is like 12 years old, and not even handsome. Are girls really climbing all over themselves to get with him?

Not to mention the fact that he's telling these girls they have to grow up and be more mature, but he's still making songs about lemonade and videos with cartoon coyotes chasing after him.

Get a clue Chi Ali. Just because Dres from Black Sheep is your brother, don't think you have his "skillz."

BUT I'LL BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW THIS:
Chi-Ali is currently serving a 14-year prison sentence in Elmira Correctional facility over the murder of his ex-girlfriend's brother in 2000. The dispute was over $300 and some CDs!!!! And his real name is Chi-Ali Griffith! He was actually profiled on America's Most Wanted.

And to the cops of Fulton County (GA), he was known as a fugitive!



Walking down the street and I saw this honey
She was dipped, the opposite of bummy
I stepped to her, I said "Yo you look swell"
Give me your number, you have a man, I won't tell
It really don't matter cause to me it means nothing
Next time I'm feeling rough, I'll just snuff him
Anyway, how old are you G?
13, I'm Audi
The girl said, "Hold up, who you think you are?"
I said, "I'm Chi-Ali, a superstar"
She said, "I may be young but don't be mislead
With this dope body you'll choose me instead"
I said, "Don't get me wrong, your body may be ready
But come back in three years when your mind is more steady
I'm not trying to diss you, I'm just trying to blow up"
But do me a favor, hon, and grow up

Wu-Tang Clan - "M.E.T.H.O.D. Man"

By popular demand...

Say what you will about the Wu. In fact, I will say something: their first album is one of the top five hip hop albums ever created. After that they put out various product from excellent, like Liquid Swords and ...Cuban Linx..., all the way down to piss-poor, like Bobby Digital and Heavy Mental. I have always said Wu-Tang Forever would have been a classic album if they had gotten rid of the dead weight like the first track and "Black Shampoo" and only put the one album's worth of outstanding songs on there. In fact, I may just create my own Wu-Tang Forever single-album using the power of CD burning technology.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. Say what you will about the Wu-Tang Clan, but they are essentially marketing geniuses. Or were at one time. They branded themselves with the awesome "W" logo that my boy Don C has proudly tattooed on his arm. (In fact, can we get a pic of that, Mikey?) The used to have the perfect knack for releasing their solo albums: just when you were getting sick of the last one, they would crank out the next one. They did it like that for about 3 years.

But this song is exactly why they are genius, for two reasons. One, they get the most marketable of their MCs (yes, that includes ODB) and have him put out a very catchy, but dirty rap song. Dirty meaning grimy. But the real genius is the prelude to the song. Since the Wu was trying to pimp out their brand, they had to have a hook, and their hook was that they had 8 MCs, all (well most) talented, and they had this mystique about them. But since this was the single, it would be the most played of their songs at first. So what do they do? They run down all 8 members of the Clan right off the bat, so you know exactly who you're dealing with.

Anyone who knows this song knows the timeless intro of "From the slums of Shaolin, Wu-Tang Clan strikes again, the RZA, the GZA, Old Dirty Bastard, Inspektah Deck, Raekwon the Chef, U-God, Ghostface Killah and the Method Man..." And usually when any of us recite the eight members of the Clan, we do it in that order. Genius. (And I don't mean GZA.)



Clip is loaded when I click bang dang
A Wu-Tang slug hits your brain
J-U-M-P jump and I thump
Make girls rumps like pump and Humpty Hump
Wow, the Shaolin style is all in me
Child, the whole damn isle is callin me
P-A-N-T-Y-R-A-I-D-E-R mad raw I don't cry
Meaning no one can burn or toss and turn me
Ooh I be the super sperm
Chim chimmeny chim chim cherie
Freak a flow and flow fancy free
Now how many licks does it take
For me to hit the Tootsie Roll center of a break
Peep and don't sleep the crews mad deep Wu-Tang
Fadin motherf**kers like bleach
So to each and every crew
You're clear like glass I can see right through
You're whole damn posse be catchin em all cause you vic'd
and ya didnt have friends to begin with

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Goodie Mob - "Soul Food"

Before Cee-Lo was in Gnarls Barkley, most of us remember him from the Goodie Mob, along with Big-Gipp, T-Mo and Khujo. Goodie Mob, incidentally, had one of the coolest acronyms in rap: "The GOOD DIE Mostly Over Bulls--t." And what was cool about these guys was not only their crazy pre-Dirty South look, but their rapid fire delivery and overlapping lyrics.

In this video they are all working in a fast food joint, getting hassled by customers and the boss. And they are bad employees! There is something about all their faces I just love. And I like that when they leave their corporate job, they hang out at a diner in the middle of the night eating food that you have to sing-song to talk about. Corn-BREAAAAD, CHIT-liiiiins, Collard GREEENS, etc.



Sunday morning where you reating at?
I'm on 1365 Wichita Drive
Ole' burd working the stove ride
Churches dripping chicken in yesterday's grease
Didn't go together with this quart of Mickey's
Last night hanging over from a good time
yeah beef is cheaper but
It's pumped with "red dye" between two pieces of bread
Shawty look good with dem hairy legs
Wish I could cut her up but, ma stomach come before sex
A house full of hoes now what's the ingredient
Spaghetty plus her monthly flow

The Scratch Story with Jessica Jason (feat. Whiz Kid and Jazzy Jay)

This is some kind of PSA from 1981, and it's almost 7 minutes long.

Jazzy Jay is one of the great old school DJ's, and here he shows some ingenue how the black guys scratch records. It's like DJing 101. Jazzy Jay wasn't going to use up his good stuff here, but it's pretty cool anyway. It's almost like a commercial for old school rap.

What's amazing is that when this video came out, hip hop was essentially 6 years old or so. That puts some s--t in perspective. I do love the way this chick calls it "scratch music." And also notice how Jazzy Jay moves right in on Jessica as soon as Whiz Kid has his hands busy. And Jessica does a nice job of whitely nodding her head as if she has any idea what's going on.

RZA and Ol' Dirty Bastard at a Talent Show

By demand...

This pretty much tells you everything you need to know about the Wu. This is a very slim Ol' Dirty Bastard and the RZA performing at some kind of talent show. Basically Dirt McGirt and Zig-Zag-Zig-Allah just bullshit for about a minute fifteen. What is remarkable is that they yell at the soundman to turn the music down, and then speak nothing but pure nonsense for about a minute. Then RZA starts talking about "d--k hardening" and "p---y wetting" and then someone comes out and tells him to keep it clean.

Then RZA starts to bust a very weak freestyle about getting a hummer from some chick, while some random dude in a 1987-era Chess King shirt walks behind him at about 1:45. Seriously, if this was the first you had seen of the RZA, you would never have known they would have ruled hip hop for about a half-decade. Kind of amazing really.